Jack of All Trades

Sometimes, I feel a bit like a 'Jack of all Trades'. I obviously don't mean this in a literal sense, because I could never just go be a plumber or an electrician or a mechanic. My realm of knowledge is very, very limited for sure. But I've still been thinking about this a lot lately. Maybe that just comes with the SAHM territory. We live on one income, so I try to do things myself as much as possible to save us money. It could just be part of my personality too, I guess. I'm almost always willing to try it. I am ALWAYS willing to ask questions about it for sure, or look it up online to figure things out. And, with Aaron working full time, I feel bad making up long lists of 'to-do's' for him when I feel like I'm perfectly capable to do them myself.

Anyways, the real reason I bring this thought up is because I realized that I feel most often like I can do a little of everything, but I'm not great at any of them. More than that, I don't really have any desire or passion to be great at any of the things that I can do either. Which, I suppose, is my real dilemma.

I've been thinking about the future a lot, as my kids keep get older. I know that I don't want to be a SAHM forever. I always knew that I'd like to pursue some form of work when my kids are older and in school full time. I also want the flexibility of schedule. I have done the two weeks off a year corporate job thing when I worked at Bank of America. It was a blessing to work there at the time, but I HATED that I had to miss everything while my family had holidays off and breaks and all of that. I know that unless I wanted to be a teacher too, it's not realistic to expect all of the same time off (and I am NOT a teacher). However, I would really like the flexibility to take some of that time off too!

So, after lots of thought - I have finally decided on going to school for cosmetology when Noah is in school full days. It is only a 1 year commitment to school. I know it would take a few years to build a clientele, but I think in the big picture it could be the kind of job that could offer me flexibility that is also a 'trade' I can have for the rest of my life.

Here is my mental/emotional dilemma though - can I do it? Will I succeed at it? I am decent at a lot of things but not great at any of them. Is this just going to be one more area that this rings true in? I am afraid that I will spend the money and the time and just be okay. Which in that business is not great. And, no offense to anyone, but I really do NOT want to end up working at some cost cutters or great clips or whatever.

So, this is me venting and word vomiting my worry, fear, insecurity or basic unsure-ity in myself, what I can do that I will enjoy & can also make money to help my family financially too. Awesome. I DO think I needed to write it all out though, because I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Very contemplative right now I guess.