One thing

that is hard for me, is not being able to help/fix/change anything for my friends & family when things are hard for them. I'm talking about when there are big problems - like big financial trouble, marital trouble, deep struggles in faith, etc. I HATE that!

I mean, when you love someone, doesn't it just suck to feel so helpless?!

So, I pray. I ruminate. And I hope for change (for the better).

Interesting article on Marriage ...

I just read this interesting article in The New York Times titled "Is Marriage Good for Your Health?"

In the article it talks about the link between your physical health & your relationship status. It started with a study that was done in 1858 about married people being more physically healthy than single people, and single people being more healthy than widows/widowers. Obviously, our society today is a bit more complicated than those 3 categories of old. We have divorce, homosexual relationships, lots of people choosing to just live together rather than ever marry at all, etc.

So, there have been tons of studies since then that are more relevant to TODAY. The part that is STILL very proven, is that our physical health is absolutely linked to our emotional health (which our relationships are an intricate part of).

"The results showed that the women in unhappy relationships and the women who remained emotionally hung up on their ex-husbands had decidedly weaker immune responses than the women who were in happier relationships (or were happily out of them)."

Research shows that some level of relationship stress is inevitable in even the happiest marriages. The solution isn’t to stop fighting. It’s to fight more thoughtfully. “Difficulties in marriage seem to be nearly universal,” he said. “Just try not to let fights be any nastier than they need to be.”

Also noted is the importance of taking time off together and making sure their disagreements don’t degenerate into personal attacks. Use those moments of stress as an opportunity to repair the relationship rather than to damage it. “It can be so uncomfortable, even in the best marriages, to have an ongoing disagreement,” she said. “When your marital relationship is the key relationship in your life, a disagreement is really a signal to try to fix something.”

So, in the end I found this article really encouraging. There are real health benefits to being stubborn enough to keep dealing with problems until they are actually solved! ;-) I can't count how many fights (*ahem* discussions) we had in our first years of marriage that went on for hours and after the few minutes of being upset, really went deep into what was really going on, and truly dealt with our issues at the time. And now, we actually have far fewer of those. Once in a while we will still have (& need) a discussion into the wee hours of the night - hashing things out. It's not easy, but in the end it's always been so good for us. I'm so grateful that we have that pattern established...I'm sure we will utilize it for the rest of our lives.

We have always told people "We are passionate people. We fight passionately, but we make up passionately too!" So there you have it!

**I DO have to say also, that I think it really makes a case for the times that it IS healthier to get out of a bad relationship rather than just stay in it, for the sake of staying. It definitely takes two people (and a lot of work from both of them) to have a healthy happy relationship.

here's the link:

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/18/magazine/18marriage-t.html?scp=1&sq=is%20marriage%20good%20for%20your%20health?&st=cse

The truth about THIS Stay at Home Mom

1. Nap time is mostly for my benefit. When they were babies, it was for both of us, and my kids will still occasionally have super crabby days where they NEED a nap, but for the most part - it's for my benefit now. Of course, nap time is usually just a quiet time now. Call it what you want - it's really for my sake.

2. I wear some version of sweat pants or lounge pants almost every day. I know that I shouldn't, but I do.

3. I will wait to pick up my house(with the exception of small tidying) until just before my husband comes home. Oh sure, it will seem like it took me all day, but most often I only spent 15 or 20 minutes on it.

4. I have the luxury of working out when my kids are at preschool. Let me restate this in a more accurate fashion: I force myself to workout when they are at preschool. Yep, I've become that mom. Now, don't get me wrong...I'm not some pampered pooch with perfect nails, bod, hair & makeup (as you all know). I'm just the red faced mom in sweats picking up her kids from preschool. Most of the time I want to say "I was just working out. I DO own other clothes, people. I swear! And I do my hair sometimes too..." Ugh! So much for caring what other people think, right?!

5. There are more, but I'm drawing a blank...maybe next time...

Viva La Coffee!

It's only the 19th of the month & I'm almost out of coffee. My Costco membership needs to be renewed & we can't afford to renew until Aaron gets paid again...grrr! I may try to get my MIL to snag some for me & I can pay her for it. I HATE buying coffee anywhere other than Costco now, because it's such a rip off! I can buy a huge 2 lb bag at Costco for $10 vs. the 1/2 lb bags for $8 anywhere else...not really a tough choice, is it?!

I feel like that dog on the commercial for beggin' strips (I think) 'bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, BACON!' Except mine is 'Coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, COFFEE!!'

Yeah, I'm addicted, and I'm okay with it. :-D

Happy Monday!!

Just thinking...

I gotta get my creative juices flowing! I finally bought more darkroom chemicals, which is a step in the right direction. Now I just need to set aside 2 or 3 hours to actually CREATE! I have another "session" scheduled this Saturday, so I might wait till I get those films back. I use quotes because I feel stupid calling them sessions. It makes me feel like a 'wanna be' or something. I'm sure that's sort of stupid, but I have enough friends/acquaintances that are doing photography (or attempting to) for a job that I think about these things. I don't really want to talk about photography too much or anything in a public setting because I don't want to be seen as if I wanna be like so & so. The truth is that I've been into photography since High School. I took my first photography darkroom class as a junior in HS & have loved it ever since then. I probably just need to stop caring what people think.

I took some pics...

and I can only put up one, as they are for a surprise for Mother's Day.

BUT here is the one :-)

Something lighter...

Spring break was awesome!!

We roller skated our little hearts out!

But wouldn't you, if you looked this cute & cool?! ;-)

We also went to 'How to Train Your Dragon', which was a blast! We took advantage of the $5 special downtown Spokane (all movies are $5 before noon - yay!). Which is a steal of a deal! Sadly, the 3D rate would have been double the price and I just could not justify spending $50 on tickets alone, so we settled for the regular 2D version. Guess what?! It was a great movie and the kids were riveted! Love, love, love it!

We also got to have friends over for dinner and play games, Jehu got to have 2 sleep overs and we got to rent a bunch of movies that we have been waiting to see forever. :-) We also decorated eggs with the fam earlier in the week and had a really great Easter too! We actually got to enjoy our Easter with close family friends joining us (well, those that weren't home sick anyways).

How can you resist cute faces like these?! You can't.

Until they are so hopped up on sugar that you suddenly can. ;-)