Lessons I've learned....

I am ever amazed at what being a stay at home parent entails.

I've been ruminating (shock, I know) on how many things I have learned how to do in this job over the years. Just this morning, I have already been outside fixing our retaining wall for the second tier of our yard...hammering the brackets into the wood and then screwing them in, so they stay put. Of course, this is also while keeping the kids on task to get ready for school & eating their breakfast, etc. All before 9am.

I have learned to ask questions. I no longer care about sounding like I don't know what I am talking about, because I probably don't. (And I have also learned that this is probably easier for me, as a woman, than for my husband...because, like it or not, there is still a stereotype that all guys should just know all things fix-it. And when they don't - other guys talk down to them. This still annoys the hell out of me, but that's a post for another time.)

I have learned that it is best to either bring in the exact part that is broken or needs to be replaced or at least take a picture of it, so I can show the people at home depot what I am looking for exactly. That one took a few years to really learn the hard way (and way too many trips back & forth to Home Depot to get the right part in the right size with the right connector piece....gah!).

Some people will try to tell you that once something breaks it will probably be cheaper to just buy a new one than to look for a replacement part. This, of course, depends on what broke, but a little investigating goes a long way. Facebook can be more than just a social thing - when in doubt - ask about it on the ole FB & see what you get back. I found out about an appliance replacement parts shop in my town that has saved us a ton over the years - all because I asked a question on FB. That's not even including the vast info found on the internet...youtube has tons of videos on how to replace or fix all sorts of stuff on there. Why buy a new Stove/oven when you can buy a new heating element for $40? It took 20 minutes to replace. Dude.

Don't discount the local fix-it guy who does it out of his own garage or old shop/store front. I will preface this with - trust your instincts! If you get the creeps - don't do it! However, it could be worth a call - ask a few questions & try to get a feel for how knowledgeable the person is. We just got our lawnmower fixed for $40 last week. Sears wanted to charge me $40 just to look at it & even that was gonna take weeks.

When money is tight - don't forget to ask about used parts. They are way cheaper & are often just as good. We've done this with car parts, tires, TV parts, etc. It's not always worth it, but sometimes it REALLY is!

When buying a vehicle - think about all the ways it will cost you money in the future...does it have an unusual tire/rim size? Or just big tires? SUV tires are expensive! What about the engine? Is it a funky set up that will cost a ton in labor every time you need something fixed? The hubs & I have already been talking about biting the bullet & getting some kind of minivan or smaller rig when we DO buy a new car, because our SUV is big & safe & we love it, but it is also a gas guzzler & tires cost a ton! Unlike my in-laws minivan that fills up for $40 less, drives for a lot longer on that gas & has standard car tires (hello - like WAY cheaper to replace if needed!!).

I guess a good summary is this: stay at home parent = jack of all trades.

Or maybe that's just because I'm cheap. Hmmm. Either way, these are just a few of the valuable life lessons that I have learned. :-)

Whew!

Sorry for the gap in posts...my mom was visiting from out of town, so I have been a bit busy. :-)

We had a great visit...full of coffee drinking and lots of gabbing (of course).

In the midst of all of this, I heard from Paul Mitchell about fafsa...they finally got all of that in order. Yahoo! That means, I can get some Pell grants for school as well as Stafford Loans for the rest. This is a big deal because of their low interest rates as well as the most important part - the loans are deferred until you complete school.

I'm not gonna lie: we had some celebration dancing going on. :-)

I got all the financial stuff in order & signed it all at the school last week. It's a done deal, yo! June 29th - here I come! It was really fun that my mom could be here for this too - I got to take her on a tour of the facility and show her all of the fun gadgets & gear that I will be getting soon, too! Part of me felt like I was 12 again though...I had my mommy with me, at my new school, after all. ;-) However, when she started to get her camera out & asked to take a picture of me with the equipment, I had to draw the line. "Umm, now I feel really dumb. Sorry mom - I can't do that." (flashback to actually being 12, yet in a 32 year old woman's body...um *awkward*) Gotta love moms, right?! I just kept saying "she's just visiting from out of town".

Any-whoo, we had a great visit & I promised her that I'd send her some pictures from my first day of school. ;-) Cause that won't be awkward at all, right?!

Oh, funny addition to the story: when we drove up, there was this kid leaving the school with his dad (with a bunch of papers in hand). The kid looked no older than 17 with a total Justin Bieber-esque haircut. How much do you want to bet that the kid is gonna be in my class?? Sweet Lord - I am SO gonna be the old lady there. :-S *face-palm*

So fun!

This has been our life over the last couple of months. The following pictures are of my oldest son at his baseball game. It's kind of like instant replay. :-)

Here he comes running to home plate (he's on the right in the red batting helmet)...

Starting to slide into home...

And he's SAFE!

I love this last picture. Isn't it so dramatic with the ump standing over them all - emphatically calling SAFE. Jehu was SO proud!

Grace...

I have been ruminating about a few things lately. I ruminate. I'm a ruminator.

I've been feeling frustrated a lot more easily lately. And I finally realized (after much ruminating) that I think it's about grace. I was graced for many years to be a stay at home mom and with that came a sense of contentment and enjoyment in all of the little things everyday. It doesn't mean it wasn't hard or frustrating ever, but overall I felt full and content. I had dreams, but I had a peace about it being in the future and not now.

As I have gotten oh so close to starting this new chapter in my life (& ours as a family) I have felt that old grace dissipate. It's like water running through my fingers. I am trying to focus on enjoying things the way they are right now, because they are going to be changing. And I DO for the most part, but I have also been feeling a lot of guilt at how hard I have to try.

I know I don't have to say this, but I still feel compelled - so here goes: This is not a lack of love for my kids. I adore them. They are a big part of the reason I want to step into this new chapter too. I want to do something that allows for family to still be the priority. And I want to have a way to help support our family & enable us to do the things we want to do. I want my kids to be proud of their mom too - I want them to see this part of me. I want to bless people & step into a deeper aspect of who God made me to be, too.

I know it sounds dumb, because I'm going into Cosmetology which is a fairly vein field, BUT I really want to help people - women specifically. I want to bless them & help them feel refreshed & good about themselves. When I was pregnant & a mom of super little kids I felt drained all the time - I desperately loved when I could go to the salon & feel like a woman. I would have loved to have had those be times where I was encouraged. I had perfectly fine experiences, but I still felt like I didn't quite belong in the salon - I wasn't hip enough or thin enough, etc. I want to be what I wished that I could have had. So, that in my own little way I can make a difference in people's lives. Even if it's just to give them a relaxing experience with some encouragement & to help remind them of how beautiful they are.

So, anyways...after all the ruminating, I realize it's all about the grace. The grace to do what we are called to do in the time we are called to do it. So, instead of feeling guilty, I am trying to remind myself that it is okay - even good & necessary for the grace to be changing as I step into this whole new chapter of life.

Here's to my obsessions...

Zumba: Don't judge. Just try it. It's fun and burns 800-1000 calories in an hour! Dude, I am all about an exercise that goes by fast, burns that many calories in that short of a time and that I can actually enjoy. It's become the only exercise that I am interested in doing these days (okay, almost the only thing). I am just burned out on the regular gym activities. So, if you haven't tried it - maybe give it a shot, k?!

Friday Night Lights: we are watching the last season right now on NBC and I am loving it!

Music: I keep vacillating between my list of fav worship songs (One Thing Remains by Bethel Church, The One I Love by Generation Church & Awakening by Chris Tomlin are my top 3 songs right now) and the newest CD by Tyrone Wells 'Metal & Wood'. LOVE!!

Catching up on some chick flicks: I really liked The Switch and Life As We Know It. I've been taking over our Netflix que lately, since Aaron never watches the movies we get sent anyways. He has to be in the right mood to watch certain movies & all the movies on his list are like depressing and artsy and critically acclaimed and crap. ;-)

Counting down to the end of the kids' school!! Yippee! Only like 5 weeks left or something.

Counting down til I start school! End of June - here I come!! So, I'm all obsessed with gathering enough clothes for my school wardrobe (all black dress code). It's kind of a throw back - school shopping is fun! :-) I don't really have the $ to buy tons, so I'm trying to buy things that can inter-mix.

Drama...

Some days I am on FIRE and able to deal with everyone's crazy. I will not only listen with interest, but I will give you support and suggestions. Hell, I'll bring you dinner ta boot! But today is not that day.

Today, I can barely handle my own crazy. If you try me today, I will be honest with you, but probably not in the I-care-enough-to-be-honest with you kind of way (gracious). It will be in the do-you-think-you-are-the-only-one-with-problems kind of way (not so gracious).

Yeah, some days a girl's only got enough to deal with their own crazy.

Today is one of those days. Lord help us all.

Capturing one little moment...

I woke up to Noah, my youngest, getting in my bed and saying something about staying there all day in the coziness. :-)

Then we laid there for a few minutes, while he asked me about freckles and eyelashes and eyebrows. All while touching mine on my face. I resisted the urge to ask him not to touch my face (*I'll explain in a moment) and let him gently pet my eyebrows, lashes and my "squishy" eyelids. We talked about his few freckles that he has - even the one he has between two of his toes that he didn't even know about, but mom did. And I smiled...listening to him talk and trying to just take it all in. He is stinking cute...he likes to be cuddly still which is nice & will sometimes, just sit on my lap & squish his little cheek onto mine...I love it! Being a mom is pretty amazing! I am so blessed!

**I don't usually like Noah to touch my face, because he is a five year old boy. Lord only knows when he washed his hands last. I'm not really fond of the idea of pink eye, so it's sort of a general rule that I don't like him to be too touchy on my face (or my food) without a hand washing first.**